It's y(our) burden to bear
by annah23
Summary: This fanfic sets in after 1x20. What if Emma had taken Henry away to Storybrook? This would mean the curse can't be broken anymore.. August,who is turning back to wood, seeks for help..and finds it in the one person Emma would have never expected to see again.
1. Chapter 1

**_Author's note: Hey guys, here's my new fanfic. I rewatched season 1 to tide over the hiatus and when I watched episode 20 I wondered what might have happened if Emma would have left Storybrook with Henry. _**  
**_It might be a little confusing or illogical but however, I hope you like it! _**

**_Please, read&review! _**

* * *

**Chapter 1- Neal's decision**

Neal was about to leave his apartment when suddenly his telephone rang.

_UNKNOWN NUMBER._

He hesitated. An unknown number. Under normal circumstances Neal would never accept this call but something lead him to get this one just like something greater forced him to. He inhaled sharply when he picked up the phone.

"Helllo?"

"Neal? Neal, it's me. I need your help."

"August?!"

Neal clearned his throat. He was confused; why would August out of all people call him?

"What the hell is going on? And how on earth did you get my number?!"

August sighed.

"That doesn't matter right now. Listen, I need your help."

"Yeah, you already mentioned that. Just get to your point; I'm running late to work."

"It's about Emma."

The moment August mentioned her name Neal felt an aching pain.  
_Emma.  
_Even after all those years it hurts so much to think about her. Even the sound of her name hurt.

"Is-is she..okay?"

"Yeah, yeah she is."

"Well, is the curse broken then?"

A glimpse of hip rushed through his body before he reminded himself what a broken curse would mean: His father,who he had been running from a lifetime, would remember everything and try to find him. And Neal was sure about one thing: Even though he wants a life with Emma more than anything else he wasn't able to face his father. He just couldn't. Neal remembered the day August told him that Emma arrived in Storybrooke and that she was about to break the curse. He was relieved but also very afraid when he heard these news. On the one hand it would mean that Emma will finally be reunited with her family and that's what he always wanted for her but on the other hand it would mean to face the devils of his past.

"No. And _that's_ the problem."

"Okay man, I absolutely don't understand what the hell you are talking about!"

Neal nearly screamed but this man was driving him crazy.  
August inhaled deeply.

"She's gone. Emma. She left Storybrooke."

"Why would she leave?"

"That's neither here nor there. The point is that the curse needs to be broken but that won't happen if she denies to accept the truth.  
She has to _believe_ in it. In herself. "

"Well, then get her back. I thought this is your creepy part in this whole crap."

"It used to be but i failed, Neal. You know that I'm turning back to wood right? I can barely move my arms or even walk. Even if I want to I CAN'T. I can't get her back. It's to late for but it's not to late for all the others in Storybrooke. That's why I need you."

"Me?! Why me?"

Even though Neal divined what August would ask him to do he just couldn't admit it.

"You need to get her back. Back to Storybrooke. You need to convince her. To make her believe."

_There he said it._

"You know I can't do this, right?

"Oh, you _can _and you know that. You're just too afraid. Too afraid to face her and your father."

"August..."

"Look Neal, I know you think that Emma doesn't want to see you and yes, maybe she doesn't. But that's not the point. The point is that you let her go because you wanted to do right by her. To get her home. But if she doesn't break the curse this will never happen. Your sacrifice would mean nothing. All these years wasted. Is this what you really want? You have to do right by her again just like you always do. Just like you always wanted to.  
Please, Neal. The curse NEEDS to be broken. Emma needs you. You're our only hope."

Neal knew that he was right. With every word he said but it was still a hard decision to make. Could he really do this? Was he really ready to face her? Emma? Or even his father? He didn't know. He never would.

"Are you still there, Cassidy?"

Neal took a deep breath. He made his decision: No matter how hard and complicated it would be Emma needed his help and that was all that mattered.

"Where can I find her?"


	2. Chapter 2

**_Author's note: Soo, here's chapter two. It takes place a few days before chapter one. I hope you like! R&R for more :) _**

* * *

**Chapter 2- Home? **

Emma softly stroke over Henry's cheek and gave him a gentle kiss on his forhead.  
He's been sleeping like a rock ever since they arrived at the motel. After their road trip both have been exhausted but Emma wasn't able to sleep. She looked down at her son once again. So, that's how it's supposed to feel. Family.

Henry looked so different when he was asleep. He looked much younger and vulnerable.  
There was no sign of the strong and smart boy he normally is. At this moment Emma felt a warm rush of love through her veins. She knew that whatever it would take she would keep him safe. She would protect him.

Even though Henry wasn't very...amused about her decision but he would understand. He just had to.  
Emma sat herself down on a chair next to the open window and watched the sunset over the Oceanside.  
She would have never expected to come to Tallahassee again. At least not after the two years she spent here. Looking for something. For someone.  
But she was badly disappointed. Once again.  
However, when she decided to take Henry away from Storybrooke Tallahassee was like a scarlett letter. It was the only place she could go.  
The only place she could nearly call home.

The moment Henry said he would want to live with her more than anything was one of the greatest thing Emma ever heard in her life.  
She knew that from now on she couldn't just run away when it gets complicated. She had to take responsibility. From now one she had to be a mum to Henry just like he always deserved one.

Despite all these years she ignored her responsibility as a mum she was now ready. She was ready to be his mum and this awareness made her strong.

"Mom?"

Emma turned around and a warm rush raised through her veins. He never really called her "mom" before. She couldn't help but smile when she looked at her son and responded:

"What is it kid? Did I wake you up?"

He looked down at his feet. Something was wrong with him.

"Hey Henry."

Emma stood up and kneeled down in front of her son.

"Hey, look at me. What's wrong?"

"The curse...We have to go back."

"Henry.."

"It NEEDS to be broken."

"Henry..this isn't a story. This is reality. I'm not the savior. I'm not a hero. I'm nothing."

Henry shaked his head.

"No. It's not true you are…"

Emma interrupted him. "Henry, please. Let's not talk about the curse right now. Let's concentrate on this. Tallahassee. It's a very beautiful space, don't you think?"

"Yes but.."

"Henry, I just..I just need some time. Time to clear my head, ok? And then we can talk again, all right?"

Henry knew he had no chance to disagree.

"All right."

* * *

Later that evening, Emma went to grab something to eat and Henry was finally alone. He knew he couldn't convince her to come back but maybe somebody else could.

He went to the small phone and dialed a number.  
It rang a few times before finally someone picked up.

"Hello?"

His voice sounded different. Exhausted. Tired.

"August? Is it you?"

"Yeah, it's me. What is it kid?"

"Emma and I..we… we left Storybrooke."

"You WHAT? No. No,no,no. This can't be. She has to come back."

"I know. I know. But she won't. I tried. She's just too stubborn.  
I-I need your help. Please, August. You need to help me; for Operation Cobra."

"Of course I will. I'll help you to get her back. Where are you?"

"Tallahassee."


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note : Hey guys, thanks for all the reviews/favs/favorites! I'm so glad you like my story! :) Well, here's chapter three... I'm not so sure about this one but anyway, I hope you like it!**

Please R&R! :)

* * *

**Chapter 3- A place supposed to be home**

„Excuse me, Sir? You got to get out here."

Neal slowly woke up and needed a few moments to sort himself and to realize where he actually was.  
His neighbor, an old and very gentle lady, was looking at him.

"You got to get out here, right?"

Already? He must have slept for a couple of hours.

"Yeah, right. Thank you for waking me up!"

He liked this woman. They've had a pretty interesting and exhilarating conversation. She was about to visit a nephew of hers in Florida and told him that he's going to get married this week and he told her about his plans. Well, not everything but the most important facts.  
However, somehow he must have fallen into sleep and almost missed his end station.

Neal stood up and took his duffel bag which was placed above them.

"Goodbye Miss."

"Goodbye. And that girl you're about to see; just show her how you really feel. If it's real love you felt, you can't walk away from it."

Neal nodded and smiled at her before he turned around to leave.

The moment he jumped out of the bus a warm summer breeze welcomed him and he turned around to observe this place.

_Tallahassee._

Even though he's never been here and even though he was a bit disappointed that it's not so close to the ocean, it felt like home.  
Maybe it was just the memories and the future plans he used to have with Emma but somehow he felt connected to this place. Like this is the place where he was supposed to have a life with the woman he loved more than anything in the world. Where he was supposed to finally find a place he could call home.  
But life had its own plans. It wasn't destined to be.

Whatsoever, after his conversation with August he immediately packed some stuff and hopped on the next bus towards Florida.  
August gave him an address of a motel where Emma was supposed to be. He couldn't figure out how August got the address considering that Emma refused to listen to him.

Anyway, Neal was used to things like that with August. He always shows up in the picture and messes with his life and someday Neal would pay it back to August. Not in the harsh way but he would find one.  
But that didn't matter in that moment.  
He was supposed to find Emma as soon as possible and to convince to come back to Storybrooke.

* * *

An hour later Neal was standing in front of the motel.

_11._

The number of the room Emma was staying in and the number of years that passed since they last saw each other.  
Irony has its own sense of humor.

Eleven years passed since he last saw her. Her blonde hair, her remarkable green eyes, the soft touch of her skin.  
At this moment Neal was overwhelmed by thousands of memories, pain and feelings of guilt.  
All these years he tried to bear them down but it never completely worked.  
And now-now he was so close but also so afraid.

_What if she doesn't want to talk to me? What if she doesn't believe me? If she doesn't even listen to me? What if…?_  
_No Cassiday. Stop! He urged himself._  
_You gotta do this now. No running away. Stand your man and show a little courage._  
_You can do this._

With these thoughts in his head he walked across the street straight towards the door with number ten.  
He slowly raised his hand and knocked three quick times. Emma and he always did this as a secret code.  
He waited a few moments; nothing happened. He knocked again, waited- and again, nothing happened.

Neal looked down at the piece of paper on which he noted the address.  
No doubt, he was right.  
Well, maybe she's out. He decided to wait until Emma returns.

Suddenly a young boy appeared around to corner and looked pretty surprised when he discovered Neal.

"Eh…can I help you?"

Neal looked up at the boy. Something about him was some sort of familiar but he couldn't figure out why.

"Do you live here?

" Neal stood up.

"Yeah.."

"Oh well, then I guess I'm wrong. I was looking for an Emma Swan. She was supposed to live her. "

Neal was about to grab his duffle bag when the boy responded.

"No, you're not wrong. She does live here. Emma is my mom."


	4. Chapter 4

**_Author's note: Hey guys! Thanks to all of you for the reviews/follows/favorites! It really means a lot to me!_  
_So, here's chapter 4. It's not my best work but anyway, I hope you like it! _**

_Read&Review :) _

* * *

**Chapter 4 - Well, who doesn't love a surprise? **

Emma enjoyed the rays of the rising sun on her skin as she inhaled the flavorful smell of her coffee.  
It was early in the morning but Emma hadn't been able to sleep any longer.  
This place was just filled with too many painful memories.  
This was the place where she was supposed to find her home. Her happy ending.  
This was the place she had spent 2 years hoping to find it.  
All in vain.

When they left Storybrooke Emma was sure that Tallahsee would be the perfect spot to go but now she realized that she might have been a bit too sure of it.  
At this stage she wasn't sure if she could stay her for longer than a few days.  
Henry reminded her of Neal and her past every single day and combined with this place the painful memories were just too much.  
However, she'd find a way. She always found one.

" Morning mom."

Emma turned around appalled. She didn't think Henry would be up this early.

"Morning kid."

She smiled at him affectionately.

"Did I wake you up?"

"No, you didn't."

Henry smiled back at his mom. Even though he still wanted her to come back to Storybrooke he enjoyed the time he could spent with her and so did Emma.

"Are you hungry?"

"I'm starving."

"Me too. What do you think. I'm going to take a quick shower and then we can go out and have a delicious breakfast. I know a nice little coffee with exquisite hot chocolate. "

"Sounds good."

"Good."

Emma turned around, grabbed some clothes of hers and disappeared in the bathroom.

An hour later the two off them sat in front of their empty plates. Filled up and happy.

"It was soo good."

"I know. I used to come her almost every days when I lived her. "

"How was it to leave her? Why Tallahassee? And why did you leave? Where did you live oh and where did you work? "

Emma smirked;Henry looked at her with these brightening eyes filled with curiosity.

"Well, it was great. Tallahassee is such a beautiful place. An old…"

Emma hesitated for a second

"Well, he told me about Tallahassee and I thought it sounded nice and when I came her I decided to stay. I worked in a little bar two blocks away from her and I lived in a very small and cheap apartment, nothing special but adequate enough.  
And someday I don't know, I just decided that it's time to go on. Here's the thing kid, I always tried to find a place I could call home and for a time I thought it could be Tallahassee and when I realized it wasn't I wanted to keep on searching. "

"Was Storybrooke home to you?"

Emma inhaled deeply.

"Somehow I guess it was but honestly just because you were there. I realized some time ago that home is wherever your family is and you're my family Henry. No matter where we are it will always be home."

"But what about Mary Margaret? Wasn't she also family to you?"

"Henry, you know she would have stopped from leaving."

"Yeah but…"

"Henry, please. Let's not talk about her or Storybrooke anymore. Let's just enjoy this day, ok?"

Henry nodded.

"So, what do you wanna do? Do wanna see the ocean? It's just a few miles from here. We could take the bug and go on a little trip. What do you say?"

"That sounds great."

Henry jumped up in excitement.

"What are you waiting for mom? Let's go!"

* * *

A couple of hours later Emma and Henry arrived at the motel. It was late in the afternoon and both were happy and tired. They just had a very nice day.

"I'll choose a movie and you can grab some snacks, all right?"

Henry's eyes sparkled and he seemed so happy-and it was so good to him that happy.

"Sounds great."

As soon as the Emma stopped the car, Henry jumped out and ran to their motel room.  
Emma got out by herself and smirked when she watched her son running.  
Earlier in the car they planned to make a movie night which is why Emma's supposed to grab some snacks from the automat next to the reception.  
Emma made her way back to their motel room and she suddenly heard Henry talking to someone. She began to walk faster and the moment she turned around the corner she spotted Henry and another man.  
Her heart stopped beating and she froze in her movements.

_No. No, this can't be. What the hell was HE doing here?_

"Neal?!"


	5. Chapter 5

_**Author's note: Hey guys, here's chapter five already. **_  
_**I hope you like it!**_

_**R&R like always :) **_  
_**Love **_

_**PS: In the next chapter Emma and Neal are going to talk about their past and I try to put in aspects we didn't see on the show. **_

* * *

**Chapter 5 - All these feels**

"Your mom?"

Neal mumbled in disbelief. Emma had a kid. A kid with that age. She must have been quite young. _How old might he be? _

The little boy examined him bemused.

"Yeah..she is. What do you want from her?"

"How old are you kid?"

Neal had a bittersweet assumption.

"I'm almost eleven. Why? And what do you want from her?"

Eleven. He's almost eleven. A rush of pain,shock and guilt almost overwhelmed him.  
Could it be? Could it really be? Could this boy right infront of him really be his son?

"I-I eh- I need to talk to her. "

Henry looked up at him with a bright smile on his face.

"Did August send you?"

Now it was over; Neal didn't understand anything anymore. His head was spinning around.

"How do you know that? How do you know _him_?"

"I asked him to help me get my mom back to Storybrooke so she can break the curse."

"Wait, you know about the curse? And you _believe_ in it?"

"Yep."

Neal rushed his hand through his already messy hair.

"Damn it, August. Such a…"

"Neal?!"

All of a sudden Emma was standing in front of sound of her voice made his heart beat so fast and when he looked up and straight towards her he felt like he would after all those years she looked so incredible beautiful and graceful.

"Emma."

Neal cleared his throat and forced himself to look her straight into the eyes.  
But the way she looked at him – a mixture of pain ,loneliness , sadness and confusion- made him weak.  
Emma tried to catch some air, still so shocked to see him again after all those years.

"Neal…"

This time it was only a weak whisper.  
Henry looked confused at his mom; and also a little frightened.

"Mom are you okay?"

He grabbed her hand.

"Do you know him?"

Henry looked her into the eyes and waited for an answer.

"Mom?"

Emma finally woke up out of her numbness and kneeled down.

"Hey kid, I need you to stay in the apartment for a little while ok?"

"But why….I…?"

"Henry, please. I'll explain it to you later but before I do that I have to figure out what exactly is going on here all right?"

"All right. "

Emma hugged him tightly and opened their motel room.

"I'll be back soon."

She closed the door and in the moment Neal wanted to say something Emma raised her hand and slapped him right into his face.

"Well, I guess I deserved that one."

"Damn right you did."

Emma tried to slow herself down but it didn't work. A few minutes ago she was in shock but now everything she could feel was anger and hate when she looked at this man standing in front of her.

"What the hell are you doing here?!"

Emma yelled at him.

It's been eleven years.  
Eleven years ago he left her. Abandoned her and sent her to jail. Pregnant .Henry. _How dared he?_  
Neal could see how hurt she was and he couldn't bear to look at her.

"It's complicated."

Neal looked down at his feet.

"Complicated? Really?"

"Emma…Please, I-"

"Where were you Neal? "

Emmas voice was nearly breaking and Neal could see the tears in her eyes.  
He wanted to reach out for her and pull her into a hug more than anything else but he knew she wouldn't allow him to.

"Why did you leave? Why did you let me go to jail? Where you just using me? Did you just need someone to take the fall for all the watches you stole?"

"Emma, I wasn't using you. Please let me explain."

Emma ignored him. Even though she tried to stay calm she failed.

"I mean have you any idea what you've done to me? What I've gone through? You destroyed my life, Neal!"

The pain was too much. Suddenly everything came together.  
Tallahassee. Neal. Their dream.  
All the memories she tried to pull away all this time.  
Their past. The Bonnie and Clyde act. The first time they met. Their yellow bug. The I-love-you's. And that moment she realized he was gone and that he would come back; that she'd never see him again.  
The moment her heart broke into a million pieces.  
And the day she found out about Henry.  
All these memories, all these experiences changed her. Formed her. Made her to the person she was today.

"Emma, please. Let me explain. I know I've hurt you and I know what I did to you is unforgiveable but I need you to listen to me. It's important."

It broke his heart to see her like that. So vulnerable and hurt.

"Okay. I'll to you but I only give you ten minutes."

Neal nodded in agreement.

"Okay."


	6. Chapter 6

_**Author's note: Hey guys, I'm back! Sorry that it took so long but I've been pretty busy.  
Anyway, I decided to update chapter 6 because I didn't really like it anymore.**_

I just hope that you'll like it! 

**_Pretty please R&R! (Reviews mean the world to me:))_**

* * *

**Chapter 6- Some talking**

They sat down on a bench near the motel in awkward mood. 

"You wanted to talk so…talk." 

Emma looked down at her crossed fingers not knowing if she wanted to hear what he had to say. 

Neal cleared his throat and looked at her. 

"The night I went to sell the watches I ran into a friend of yours; August." 

"Wait a second. August as in_ August W. Booth_?! How on earth do you two know each other?" 

Emma looked at him with confusion in her eyes. 

"I'll get there. When I ran into him he told me he is some sort of your guardian angel and that he's supposed to take care that you fulfill your destiny. That you break the curse." 

"You believed some random stranger talking about a magical curse? Neal that's insane. You all are insane." 

"Emma, please let me go on. I know this sounds insane and totally surreal but it's true. The curse affected the Enchanted Forest and well, I'm from there, too. I'm Rumpelstiltskins son. " 

"Okay Neal this heads into a strange direction and believe me I've already heard enough about this stupid curse and my role as the savior. And honestly i don't care about this whole crap. I'd like to know why you left me. Why did you, Neal? Why did you send me to jail? Why did you abandon me? Why, Neal? Why? "

Emma's voice broke that moment and she sobbed.

"Emma, I-" Neal was searching for words. Seeing her so upset, so heard and yet so confused hurt him. His heart ached only when he looked at her.  
"I can explain it to you. Everything. Believe me. It might sound insane but I promise you that I won't lie to you. I just need you to listen to me. All right?"

Emma nodded and Neal continued his story.

"When I was fourteen my father became the dark one and just totally changed. I didn't recognized him.  
He used to be a lovely father and suddenly he was that monster who killed people without even blinking with the eye. At this point in my life all I cared about was getting my father back which is why I went to the Blue Fairy and asked for help. She gave me a magical bean which would open a portal to another land without magic. There my father wouldn't have been able to conjure magic; he would have been my father again.  
He agreed but when I opened the portal he suddenly changed his mind. He was too afraid to go there but I was already sucked into the portal so there was no way back for me. But instead of coming with me he just let go of my grip and I fell into this world; all alone."

Neal stopped a second. All these memories combined were pretty hard to face. 

"I had to figure out all the things going on here on my own and somehow I became a thief and met you. And Emma believe me that nothing I ever said to you was a lie or that I only used you for my greater good. I really loved you and wanted to start a normal life together." 

Emma flinched when Neal said "I loved you." She would have never expected to hear these words from him ever again. 

"The day I ran into August he told me about the curse. I listened to him because he knew who I really was; Baelfire. That's uhm my fairytale name. However, he told me about the curse and you're role in it and I realized that my father cast this curse to find me and that everything that happened to you was my fault. I knew that I owed it to you to let you go and August talked me into it.I just wanted to help you. I wanted to get you home. I wanted you to be reunited with your family; something you've longed for such a long time." 

"And you expect me to believe all of this? That you're a fairytale character, that everybody in this town is a fairytale character and that I'm the one to save them? That you sent me to jail and destroyed my life because of all that crap?"

"Emma-"

"Seriously? Using that crap as an apology or a justification for what you did to me is faint-hearted, Neal. It's crazy, insane and just pathetic. Neal, you're a coward. Nothing more than a coward and you're just too afraid to admit that!"

Emma screamed at him.

"Stop it! I know that I'm a coward, all right? Just like my father was one. But Emma, believe me: I didn't lie to you! It's the truth!"

"I really don't need this, Neal! If you're ready to tell me the truth then come find me. Until then have a nice life."

Emma wanted to stand up but Neal grabbed her arm.

"No wait. Please! I know you can tell when anybody's lying so tell me, am I? Am I lying?"

Emma took a deep breath; her mind was spinning around crazy. Seeing him again after all those years, his crazy story... It was all too much.

She looked him straight into the eyes and something told her that he was right. The look in his face was honest and candid. But was he really telling the truth? Could all of this be possible? Was Henry right all this time?  
However, at this moment she couldn't really rely on her superpower which told her that he was indeed telling the truth but her mind told her a different tale. 

"Am I, Emma?"

Emma sighed desperately.

"I don't Neal, ok? I don't know if I'm ready to believe in all of this! I mean a magical curse? Fairytale characters alive? ME a savior? You have to admit that all of this sounds pretty insane."

"I know,Emma. I know. I wouldn't believe it either but i do know the truth. Let me show you something. Maybe this will help you to believe."

Neal pulled out a piece of old paper out of his jacket.

"This is a drawing of me-well my younger self- and my father." 

Emma took the drawing and the moment she recognized Gold she took a deep breath. 7

"That's impossible. This is Mr Gold."

"So you know him?

"Indeed I do."

"Do you believe me now?" 

Neal looked at her with curiosity and also a little bit of fear.

"I-I don't know... I mean...this is Mr Gold. Gold is your father?

"Yeah... If that's what he calls himself now then yes."

Emma sat down again with the image in her hands. She took a deep breath and realized that she started to believe.  
No matter how big her denial had been she started to believe. 

"Emma?"

"Mhm?"

"Everthing okay?"

"I-I'm fine."

"Sure?"

He sat down and wanted to grab her hand but she didn't let him.

"It's just... I think I believe."

He let out a relieved sigh.

"Thank god. Look, we gotta get back to Storybrooke as fast as possible." 

"Why?" 

"The curse. You need to break it." 

"But I don't even know how. I mean, I…" 

"We'll figure that out, okay? I promise." 

Emma nodded in agreement and stood up.  
She looked in his eyes and in that moment she remembered Henry. She blamed herself but she didn't think about him the last minutes.

She wasn't sure if she'd do the right thing but she just had to tell him about Henry. She owed it to Henry. 

"Neal? Before we go there's something you need to know."

Neal looked up at her with a beating heart. He knew what she was going to say but he didn't want to hear it. Hearing the truth out loud would hurt him even more.

"The boy you talked to earlier...he's uhm..." 

"He's mine, isn't he?" 

"Yes. Yes he is."

* * *

**So guys, I hope you'll tell me whether you liked it or not. And maybe you have some ideas how to continue? It's just that I have a little writer's block so ideas/suggestions/critisicm is desired.  
**

**Thanks for reading, oncers ;) **


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